multi-masking

Uh, yeah. That blogwhore wannabe… that would be me. (lol)

I know I made a firm resolution to make blogging a regular habit no matter how busy I am, and I failed to live up to that. Only goes to show how pathetically mechanic my life’s been for the past few months, up until recently.

Well, maybe not really mechanic. As I’ve mentioned in my previous entry, I’ve been able to get my old life back, extra-curricularly speaking. All thanks to Lee Min Ho Philippines. It’s currently among my major sources of endorphins. I joined this club sometime in May after stumbling onto its site by accident. Aside from being updated regularly with what’s going on with Lee Min Ho, I was also able to gain a handful of new friends. People have been teasing me on how childish this is but I don’t really care. I’ve never cared about texting that much after a certain turtle has left but now my text life’s been revived, thanks to the club’s text clan.

I’ve been a major mess since my mom was formally diagnosed with cancer. She had a modified radical mastectomy of the left breast last May, and sadly, the operation wasn’t a success. Her diagnosis worsened, so she had to undergo chemotherapy. She just had her 3rd chemo session sometime this week, and we’re all trying to be optimistic — me, my mom, and my sister. Due to financial constraints we had to go with the least expensive “chemo package” which I still find too much at Php50-60k per session times 6 months. Three more sessions to go — we’re all praying that by the time the treatment period is over, my mom will be cancer-free.

Work is forever blowing hot and cold for me. Just when I feel I’ve finally got it all figured out, just when I think I’ve finally found a way to manage my time more efficiently to be more productive, someone always manages to throw me off balance. I really, really hate it, but lately, I’ve mastered the “I Don’t Ca-e-e-e-are” attitude. Yeah, I’ll still grumble like hell whenever I don’t understand the rationale behind what someone is asking me to do but since I’ve got no choice but to comply, I really have no choice but to comply.

I still miss that someone, that sweet and cute little turtle who used to be mine (or so, I thought). With what’s going on in my life right now, especially during the tough times, I find myself thinking how nice it would be if he was here for me to lean on. But that’s it. I can’t say I’ve moved on, because I don’t think I ever will. Maybe it’s more of learning how to survive without him. Surviving’s not really the same as living, but it’s pretty close, right? ^^

Today, I was chatting with one of my new-found friends and discovered that he kept a blog. I dunno why, that person’s quite younger than me, but the entries I’ve read sort of inspired me to start updating my blog again. I was awestruck at how he still finds time to blog even though the pressures from schoolwork starts to get to him almost everyday. I was able to see how he oscillates in between moods before and after blogging, which only goes to show how therapeutic blogging can be when you need it to.

It’s been a while since I last expressed my feelings here. I missed it big-time…