… and I say to my self, “Sure, I’m broke, but it’s definitely worth it.”

~<3333

1 in reply to this:

2 in reply to my letter

It still feels like a dream, but I don’t want to dwell on it… But again, thank You, Lord. I know You know how much I’m really grateful for this.

I bolted upright and went online, googling the exact location of SM MOA’s Activity Center. I’ve been told there were two, and it wasn’t clear to me which of those two, and more importantly, where those were situated. Luckily, a friend had replied to my text and given me some helpful landmarks.

I was ready in less than an hour. But I was crushed as soon as I hit the road. Heavy road traffic on a Sunday? WTF?!? It didn’t last long though, so I was able to breath smoothly again.

Finally, I reached SM Mall of Asia. With the help of a kind-hearted security guard, I found the venue for One Way’s last showcase here in Manila. I got control numbers 52 and 53 (I bought a CD for Micky because she couldn’t come early) and a cheerful bunch of new friends.

It was every bit worth the long wait. The show started an hour later than scheduled. But damn. New numbers (that they didn’t perform during their Friday showcase) were added to the setlist ~ Peter tap dancing to Young Sky’s rapping and Chance singing “Forever”, among others. Okay, so I won’t deny that I wasn’t too happy with the three girls onstage while the boys serenaded them with their cover of Neyo’s “Sexy Love”, but they still rocked. Really really really rocked. Even their collaboration with local singer Christian Bautista for the English version of “Wrong Number” was awesome, with the choreography and rapport and all. And just like last Friday, friggin’ wonderful cover of “Geek In The Pink”.

And then came the most-awaited part, the autograph session. I had a million things I wanted to do but I was frozen scared, dreading rejection of some sort from them. But when I approached Peter for his signature, I was like, “What the heck, if I don’t do this now, I might never get the chance to again…”

Peter.
His eyes actually lit up when he saw me. “Hey!” he said with a big smile on his face. Whether he remembered me from Friday’s showcase, or he remembered I gave him the mango shake banner, or both, I guess I’ll never know. It could’ve been my imagination too. But I prefer to bask in what I saw and felt at that moment.

“Did you enjoy the show?”

I couldn’t stop myself from blabbing feverishly. “I loved your tap dancing.” This got me another blinding smile from him right before he said thank you.

“I love you!” I blurted out. He smiled again at this. For the life of me, I couldn’t remember if he said “Thank you” or “I love you too”, but I don’t care. I got it off my chest. I told him those three words. I got to tell him what was in my heart.

I realize he was finished signing my CD for quite sometime. Luckily the person making sure that we don’t stick around each member for too long was busy with a phone call, so I seized the opportunity.

“Can we shake hands?” I asked him. Without waiting for his reply, I stuck out my hand, and he took it. Taking that as a good sign, I got bolder with my next move.

“Can I get a hug?”

To which he replied without batting an eyelash. “Sure.”

So he stood up from his seat and we hugged.

Our cheeks touched.

He smelled so good.

I bowed slightly and thanked him before moving to Young Sky.

Young Sky.
I think we said hello to each other. I’m not so sure. But this one, I’m betting my life that this really happened.

“Pam goes One Way,” he said, reading off the words on the One Way sign printout that Micky and I both wore as a necklace.

This got me smiling ear-to-ear.

“Pam goes…” he trailed off, grinning.

“One Way?” I weakly guessed. He chuckled softly and started to sign my CD. When he was finished, I put out my hand, he took and shook it.

“Can we hug?” I asked him.

“Sure,” he replied immediately, standing up from his seat to embrace me. I thanked him afterwards and moved on to Chance.

Chance.
“Hello, did you enjoy the show?” he asked as he signed my CD

I nodded. “Yes! Thank you for singing Forever,” I said gratefully.

He looked a little surprised at first, but in a pleasant way, I think. Maybe he was touched at that? We shook hands, and as with the other two, I asked him if I could get a hug. He said yes, and we hugged. I said my thanks and even if my feet wanted to stay rooted to the ground, I followed the aforementioned rules and made my exit.

As soon as Micky caught up with me after our turn at the autograph session, we both shrieked with glee. We chatted a bit before saying our goodbyes to our new friends and stayed behind for a quick dinner before going home.

Still reeling from sheer delight, I dropped by the adoration chapel to say my thanks to the Lord on my way home. This was something new to me. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so happy, it felt like I was going to burst with so much emotion. My breathing was so irregular then (up to now, it’s still somewhat erratic). And as soon as I closed my eyes to say my thank-you prayer, tears actually rolled.

It’s scary, how this crazy whirlwind experience can feel so good. From Friday’s showcase at SM North Edsa Sky Garden to E-Live at ABS-CBN to their final mall show today. To think that it’s just one of those mere fan-idol things. But earlier tonight, while walking away from the adoration chapel, it felt as if there’s been this hole in my soul all this time, and this weekend, it seems like One Way kinda filled it up.

I kinda regret not having personally introduced myself to Peter as Mango Shake Banner girl tonight. But maybe that’s not so important now. What matters is that he did appreciate the gesture. Then again, maybe another place, another time, I just might have the chance to do it. ^^

It’s 2:04 in the morning, and my heart is still singing, soaring sky high.

Mango shake.
Tap dancing shoes.

Stuck in this one-way street.
I’m not complaining.

Last Saturday, Peter replied to my tweet on what song he wanted as a lullaby (BeeGees, “How Deep Is Your Love”), so right after I made a banner with my Twitter ID, I was thinking of making another one with the lyrics to the song. I had tweeted him the first four lines, but if I did that, it would sound kind of delusional, so I ended up deciding against it.

And then a friend, Chelle, texts me that Peter’s been reporting on Twitter that he’s tried mango juice today for the first time, and that he would love to get the recipe for mango shake. Chelle ends her SMS report with a note that it’s up to me to use that tidbit to catch his attention. Just so happened that we got these freebie folders from the mall. I can’t remember who came with the idea first, if it was me, Micky, or new friends Claudette and Rianna, but we all decided to make a banner with a recipe for mango shake for Peter. I gave that banner to him when it was his turn to sign my copy of their album.

So the autograph session ends, Micky and I fight our way through the pouring rain, and after several hours of travel, I arrive home and receive a text message from Chelle asking me what my mango shake recipe banner looked like. Too tired to describe it, I just told her I’d tweet it. And then she tells me that Universal Records has just tweeted something she believed to be mine.

To my utter delight, I saw this picture on UR’s Twitpic:

Wieeeeeeee this totally made my night. ^^

Why Taiwan? Well… because I’ll still have sometime to prepare compared to the other countries that CNBLUE will be visiting in August. They have China for October, but that’s pushing it. Distance + VISA requirements = practically impossible.

But wait. On top of booking the flight+hotel accommodations and the concert ticket itself, I still need to have my passport renewed. I already spoke with Teleserv and asked the requirements and the procedure on how to do so. If I opt for a rush passport renewal, it’ll be done in 10 business days. I can even have it delivered to our house.

It seems like a month is not enough for these preparations, not to mention the decision-making itself. One wrong move, and I’m going to be in knee-deep sh*t.

The hard part is, I know what I should do, but I’m kind of being stubborn about it. Jeez. Where’s that so-called wisdom when you need it? I was able to hold out on the Mnet Bangkok thingy last April (well, yeah, because tickets are kinda hard to get too), so what’s stopping me now?

Sigh! If only they would come to the Philippines… but I’m thinking it’s this year or never. T_T

I regret not having watched this live via streaming… I even brought my laptop with that intention, but we just lost track of time.

I don’t know much about DJ-ing, but I’ve always admired people who excel in that field. And of course, Yonghwa is no exception. ^^

Whoa. It’s like, finally, it dawned on him that people are really starting to notice his bandmates as opposed to his “You’re Beautiful” days, so he needs to show a little something new to get a little of that attention back — dunno about the others, but he definitely got mine. ^^

I want those headphones too!!!

video credits: CrazyCarrot350 @ YT

So this will probably arrive at the Makati Central Post Office either tomorrow or Wednesday~ and meaning I’ll get to claim this plus my copy of “The Way” from my aunt before the week ends! ^^

pic taken from CN Blue’s Oricon blog
big thanks to chiara for the tip~ ^^

It was higher earlier today, I think maybe number 3 or 4 (I really abhor not being able to take a screen shot), but I’m not taking it negatively ~ just like me, the ELFs have surely mellowed down a bit but that doesn’t mean that they stopped wishing Kangin well.

Kangin hwaiting~ Kangin-ah, saranghae!

To Kangin Family!
Families take care.
I’ll come back safely.

Source: Kangin Family Translated by Minnie @ SUJUISM.BLOGSPOT.COM
TAKE OUT WITH THE FULL CREDITS
DO NOT ADD YOUR NAME TO THE CREDITS

I was going to wait until a picture of Kangin right before he enters camp to surface before I write this but my heart feels so inexplicably broken that I had to start blogging about it.

ELF-wise, I was a late bloomer. I only started being a Kpop fanatic towards the end of 2007, and it wasn’t even mainstream Kpop to begin with, but just Kdrama OSTs. Now that I think about it, I think I only became exposed to a little of the real Kpop music in early 2008. Super Junior, I only “discovered” them through “Sorry, Sorry”, and I didn’t even like them the first time I saw them. But then came “Neorago” and my ELF officemates started exposing me to a lot of the past variety shows they’ve done, and I started increasing my Super Junior song database… bottomline, I eventually ate my words as they grew on me. (Heck, I even went as far as buying their albums and watching their Supershow here in Manila!) I disliked them initially because of their number, but little by little, the individuality per member was the charisma of the group; they were a melting pot of diverse personalities that sort of complimented each and everyone of them.

He’s not among my Suju biases, but Kangin’s presence in the group for me is strong. Not that there was someone who was unremarkable, but he’s among the ones I immediately notice when I watch them. His voice is catchy too~ he’s one of the few members who’s voices I’ve mastered so if I hear a song and his part plays, I know it’s him and I don’t have to check a vid or fancam just to make sure.

Since I was late in acquiring the Suju bug, the last project of him I’d seen was “Neorago” (I think). He was suspended from participating in SuJu activities due to DUI and some assault cases. I don’t know much about it, I leave that to my friend Zy who loves Kangin so much, but that doesn’t mean I am not sad about it. For a group that I have grown to love and admire because of the eclectic range of personalities it had, it was saddening to know that there are members who are not participating actively.

Super Junior released a “Boys In The City 3″ photo book around April or May of this year, shortly after their Manila Supershow, and we were elated to see Kangin was beginning to have a little exposure around that time. But to our dismay, he wasn’t in the photo book, and he wasn’t going to be participating in the upcoming fourth album. And then the shocking news of his military enlistment came out.

Which leads to today. July 5th, 2010. At around 1PM KST, Kim Youngwoon, also known as Super Junior Kangin, has officially entered the army.

As I write this, pictures have started to come out and I couldn’t stop crying while looking at them. All 10 active members of Super Junior were there to send him off, along with probably thousands of ELFs from Korea and other Asian countries. If I was in Korea, or if I had the money, I would’ve probably gone there too to see him one last time.

credits: as tagged | reup by stalker93 @ sapphirepearls

He also left a little something for his fans. After appearing in SuJu’s fan meeting last month, he also left another present by participating in this song…

credit: sujuism.blogspot.com

Kangin-ah, noona will patiently wait and continue to support you, together with Super Junior and the rest of the ELFs. We believe you’ll be a tougher, even better man after serving in the military. If we keep ourselves busy, 2 years will be over in no time. Some goodbyes are not forever. Hwaiting and saranghae!